Bought a new pair of boots last week. it was nice, comfy and i found my size plus.. its flat... love flat boots.. love heels but i'm never good in them... hehe... of cos i wish to wear nice boots with heels.. but i'm just not a heels person.. sigh...

anyway.. broke.. till i get a proper job, i will get heels for work..LOL.

week break over so that means exam is coming.. oh no.. jia you jen... have to pass...

driving lessons so far is ok.. but sturbon me.. still tend to drive too slow or too fast, turnings not so good. sobz... sigh... jia you! you can do this.

i still miss him but not that much anymore.. i think is a good thing.. no point lingering my feelings on him cos like i say before and my friends all think so.. nothing will happen... too many things to take into considerations.. so move on jen. maybe the right one is yet to come ... will it come in the next 5 years? before i turn 30? i do hope so.. but the love god might play a joke with me by never matching me with anyone.. LOL could i be lonely for my entire life?

i still remember what angie said to me abt 3-4 yrs ago..." i need to love myself first before someone else can love me" but how do you actually do that? i've been trying my best to love myself as much as i can... try to lose weight..etc... sigh...man, love and life... its just something hard to predict.... oh well..... am 25 now.... old.. like joe say... will i only get my first love at 28 and end happy or in tears? i dun know..

oi! love god, i know i not pretty and slim.. not perfect but not cruel or evil type.. why no one like me leh? sigh! .. back to my studies... sigh.. now must grad first... its the most important thing in life right now. dun wish to disappoint my family again!

my new handphone pouch

thinking of him again

i was trying my best not to think of him by going gym, taking my driving lesson, drown myself in my studies and work. basically doing anything other than thinking of him.

but things just pop in once in a while just like today.. wasn't thinking of him at all.. but so happen this guy who looks like him board the bus. sitting near me.. OMG! how to not to think of him??!!! Dun worry that is not him on the bus.. as i know he is in france now... ai yo! so look alike... my god.. i keep trying my best to look away and not thinking about him.. try to think something else like my poor leg - twisted it ytd. sobz so n gym for this week.

things like this always happen.. i mean abt him.. in uni.. at bus stop waiting for the bus.. my god.. saw a student that looks like him... so many ppl look like him.. am i seeing things??!! my god...

is my inner mind so desperate for a boyfriend that i am starting to imagine things? though at the age 25 still no boyfriend not like most of my friends who have plenty of it.. sometimes i do envy them... hmm.. maybe becos i am fat that's why no bf lah... working very hard to lose weight.. trying my best.. sobz... oh well back to my taxation.. got to finish so i can do audit.. its more scary!