Sick Sick Sick

Sick Sick Sick .. Sick of the weather!!! make me feel sick! headache... ate pandol but not working... headache... dun know what to have for dinner later... they dun wash their dishes.. hate it lor!!! OMG!

exam coming in 2 weeks i so scared now... study study study .. cannot fall sick!!! sobz..hate sick sick sick...

3 more weeks to exam

just 3 more weeks to exam .. i'm so scared! Why time fly so fast???!!! study study study... OMG... i have disappoint my law corp tutor i think. sigh! so much to do.. lab test next week.. haven practice yet.. die...

This week work extra 2 days cos not enough staffs. hope next week is back to normal. chatted with dad ytd and he planned my holiday. i will be going back S'pore for 2 weeks and rest of my holidays are in france.. cool! can't wait but have to study hard first! jia you jia you! 11+ already.. better study now.. have class at 8 2mr... Zzzz...

scary

scary.. a china girl was murdered near her home in perth on tuesday morning. she was found half naked. clothes and her bag were found a walking distance away from her. She studying in ECU in Joondalup where i use to stay.

I heard stories like high school girls gets raped in Joondalup. <- my mum told me... scary sia!! now i do dare go out so late... if i do i make sure someone send me home... worried... haven told my mum though...

CPA never reply me on my internship outcome... most likely not selected lah.. sobz... then if not selected.. the question now is where do i go for summer holidays? when do i go? France or SG??? don't know.... My jie jie never reply me... hmmm.... anyway.. study first.. plan later.... exam coming.. 4 more weeks.. plenty to catch up and study.. OMG! I'm so scared! better sleep now.. nitez!

What a scary and unlucky day

today was a scary day and unlucky day for me. on the way to work, waiting for the bus i got screamed at by a Aussie girls driving pass. i don't know her and i dun know y they like to scream like that. crazy... feels like they are high or something. then went to work.

end of work waiting for bus with my collegue, a car drive pass me while the passenger threw a bottle at me. WHAT THE HELL!!!! my collegue say maybe they trying to aim for the bin.. i look at the bin... the bin was not next to me... my god! its a distance away.. if they aim for bin it wun even hit me lor. My god.. ppl grow up! i was cursing! then i asked the bus security, he say they get cranky when the weather starts to become dry and warm. luckily, the bottle just hit my arm not cut it... no brusie but a bit sore.

then i had to change another bus to get home. so i waited at berrick st. then just b4 the bus arriving, i got screamed at again by another car, this time is a Aussie guy. WTH! sms my sister.. got on the bus and hurried home... scared...

2mr i want go chinese store to get some things.. a bit scared though...sobz

things happen

just received 2 of my test results. both didn't as well as i expected. i thought i could do better as these units that i had mid term test are those that i repeat. but i have no idea why the results turn out this way. very upset about it.

i didn't really want to apply for internship in SG but they send an email requesting i send in my essay and results. so i did. i know my chances of getting an internship is low but i still try anyway. you never know what will happen if you don't try. so i happen to get an internship, i will delay my trip to france till next yr.

only left 4 more weeks to exam... have to catch up... its very crucial now. ok.. better get back to my books.....

In the emotion - saddness

after seeing kylie having a wonderful 21st bday and mingfen having hers... it makes me feel sad. i know i didn't have one. i did have a party which my sis asked to plan but it was like feb.. it didn't feel right at the time... it feels like i am doing a bday party for someone else but not me. i feel so alone.. after my sis return to brisbane. i felt so damn alone especially on the actual day itself. oh well i can't wind back the time.. its been 3 yrs.

however, for the past 24 yrs... my bday has been so damn lonely. i think the happiest was ..... i can't remember... how sad... i can't remember which yr is the happiest... i dun have one bday with my family and friends together. part of me feels so sad, the other part is asking me to put my shoes in other ppl... they dun have what i have etc... but but.. isn't my life all about me?

ppl in my life always ask me to think of others, telling me not to selfish... can't i be selfish for once... i only live once as WANSHI.... but who cares... they are too focus on themselves and pulling u in to focus on them... that i dun have the time and the chance to focus on myself. i think the only time i had the chance to focus on myself is when i am all alone in a place like now. all alone in perth.

Sometimes i will ask myself questions like : where do i belong? Will my ppl like my friends remember me? Do they know i exist? What am i going to do next? .....

after writing so much... it always make me very tired.. tired to think abt it... my life is not a good one... no perfect life... no perfect me... going 25 soon... getting old... still no idea who i truly am? its that pathetic? i guess so.

all i can say i envy them.. they had experienced what i don't have and all i can do is envy. life really do sucks at times. No offence to those are reading this.... i just throwing my nonsense out...ignore me